Spent 80% of the weekend attending a marriage course in town - to obtain the much sought after attendance certificate that would enable us to apply to get hitched. sat in a classroom with 9 other couples listening to the challenges faced by married folks. the social, physical, financial minefields ... areas of potential conflict that could be made more complex with cultural issues thrown in.
yeowzers i was thinking. how well i know it. and how much i have talked and discussed 'issues' with sunflower man so that e-v-e-r-ything is out in the open: dosh priorities, our expectations of each other, family expectations, sunflower kiddies (should they come into the picture) not being fed sweets nor fastfood, geographical location, etc etc etc.
praying hard that we've covered all contentious areas and all will be well.
xxx
there is quite a lot of red tape to get through in this getting married malarkey.
amongst others, the need to get a letter from the embassy stating that he is single and that there is no impediment for him to get married here. in order for him to get that letter, SFM first has to make a statutory declaration that he is single, submit this document and pay RM295 (41quid!)
then the embassy issues a letter (a standard document they say with a sigh which has been accepted by the marriage registration department) which i kid you not, states:
"Mr. Sunflower man has stated to me that he intends to undergo a marriage ceremony with Ms Rara Avis and has been requested to obtain a statement to the effect that the embassy has no objection to the proposed marriage. He also stated to us that he is single and never been married before.
I certify that this office has no authority to issue such statements nor does it have authority to issue certificates of No Impediment in connection with local marriages.
I should therefore be grateful if you could provide the necessary assistance to Mr. Sunflowerman to enable him to contract his marriage in Malaysia."
We were hysterical when we read the letter, we were even more hysterical when the officials nodded their head in seriousness and ticked off 'letter from the embassy" of the required documents list.
xxx
we also have to obtain letter of approval from the immigration department since SFM is a foreign citizen - a law introduced only recently. and so we drove like maniacs all the way to Putrajaya (the new adminstrative capital built because we do not have enough space in the city of KL for government buildings haha) during lunch time . one foot meddling the pedal, two minds boggling at the sheer grandiose of the place and wondering how much it must have cost.

we were very lucky that the queues were not long and that the Man In Charge seemed to know what he was doing.
not so lucky when he decided that the letter from the embassy was not sufficient
very lucky when he grudgingly accepted it after we told him it was standard format and that we had paid FOURTY QUID = TWO HUNDRED AND NINETY FIVE RINGGIT for it.
not so lucky when he said we needed passport pictures and SFM didnt have one.
very lucky when we found out that there was a shop 2km drive away which could do instant passport pictures.
not so lucky when he said he needed my divorce certificate.
very lucky when ma and pa avis could fax the document directly to them from their home.
not so lucky when he said we both had to drive back to Putrajaya in 3 days to collect the document. but perhaps an arrangement could be made.
sooo very lucky that we do not understand backhand codewords and were effusive in thanking him for his kindness and understanding.
not so lucky for the couple next to us who understood the nudge nudge wink wink language and thus forked out some dosh to get their letter within the day...
so lucky that we could drive home with the letter in our hands and not have to worry about going back there again.
not so lucky when Man In Charge called me on my mobile phone from his mobile phone, outside his office, later in the day to ask me why i was marrying a 'foreigner' for the second time and not a Malaysian; asked me whether I was a contract bride? and pestered me for information on when the wedding was, where it was going to be and then wanted to chit-chat.
Suffice to say, SFM is more amazed than I am with all of this.
Lets call it cultural differences. Unfortunately for me, my culture today consists of severely underpaid backhander requestors who most times also happen to be sleazoids - resting against the backdrop of wide boulevards and majestic buidlings.
xxx
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